During both of our readings this week, I couldn’t help but think about the oh-so-many FB arguments I tend to get embroiled in. I certainly don’t seem to find myself in the situation Wolfe described, where women shy away from direct attacks or challenges to their points of view. If anything, it’s like I feel compelled to keep answering as long as they do…maybe not one of my better traits.

I found myself questioning Wolfe’s results (particularly after the wonderfully conscientious use of BSRI in Rickly’s study), because of the stakes of the conversation. While I’m glad that none of the students felt slighted, I wonder if that has to do with the fact that these were (largely) class-directed topics that may or may not have had any personal significance for them. She points out that most studies were conducted with professionals and graduate students, but it’s likely that (at those levels) the participants have more at stake. Being ignored, or having your topic hijacked for the use of a tangent, becomes more personal and has more risk if your livelihood (or more) is in question.

While I preferred Rickly’s study (and did find real-world connections via interruptions and the Republican debate), I did end up relating more to Wolfe–in particular how the conversational tactics she describes show up in feminist discourse between genders. It’s a common problem that, when a feminist argument is presented (usually by women), men interject with tangents that lead the conversation back to male-dominated issues. It’s true that this may be a gendered response (re: cultural training), but here is where the stakes are raised. That instinctual, trained response continues to verbally support a system that is painfully unequal. Like Rickly’s example of how “the opposite gender” verbally indicates that female = less-than, this verbal hijacking implies that both issues presented (the original and the tangent-maker’s) are of equal importance. While that is true, individually, socially it is a problem when those who have more resources insist on getting more or equal floor time every instance where an Othered individual is trying to be heard.

…I have more feelings about a cultural-gendered need for explicit agreement and lots of questions about how to work with these findings in general, but this is getting long, so I leave you with a comic.